You have probably received this email several times:
“A woman was explaining stress management to an audience. She was holding a half glass of water. Everyone thought she was going to ask the question, ‘half empty or half full?
Instead, she asked “How heavy is this glass of water?” The audience’s answers ranged from 8 oz. To 20 oz.
She replied , “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it.
If I hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes – and that’s the way it is with stress.
If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on. As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.”
The email continued with the following bits of wisdom:
Accept the fact that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue!
Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won’t have a leg to stand on.
Since it’s the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.
A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
Save the earth….. It’s the only planet with chocolate!
Categories: Wordplay Quotations