Home Life
Comments 14

Note to the Human Vultures

It seems to me the vultures have stopped circling.
– Geoffrey Becker –

Toonaday vultureHidden Valley has been a beehive of activity since the go ahead to enter the flood zone was given by Health Canada and The Siksika Nation. The predominantly senior population have donned safety equipment and entered their properties. For most of them, the recovery of a few precious items is the most they can hope for. A few others are trying to salvage pieces of their home so that they can rebuild elsewhere.

The sole road into the area is manned by security guards. This isn’t new. Hidden Valley might appear to be rather remote and isolated, but there have always been Human Vultures who knew how to bypass security. For the most part, they were more an annoyance than anything, but last March, the species know as Vandalis vulturus  caused extensive damage to 25 homes. A few of the homeowners had not yet moved back in before the flood hit.

Other vultures have been circling over our flood disaster zone for several weeks now – watching, waiting, and finally swooping in to pick up unguarded items. These vultures belong to the species Thiefus cowardesis vulturus and they seem to prefer to gobble up satellite dishes, though a set of golf clubs and a lawnmower have also apparently been on the menu.

The Provincus governmentus vulturus belong to the group of birds that are particularly good at preening. They act much like a mosquito except they suck tax dollars. There are, however, a few eagles who live with this group and though they are very hard to find, Hidden Valley is diligently hunting them in hopes that they will come to the rescue of those who are most in need.

Also disturbing are the members of the Insurancis vulturus, a species that sucks yearly insurance premiums instead of blood. So far, their cry can be heard right across our community – “Denied, denied, denied!”

Yet to descend, (or perhaps they have already and we’ve been fleeced without knowing it), are the Federalis vulturus. Six days after we were allowed to enter our properties, Health Canada (a federal department) finally released a letter advising us to ‘stay away from our properties until appropriate measures are put into place‘ to ensure our safety. Of course, they probably already knew we had entered, so they followed up with a few cautionary notes so that they could say that they had warned us.

The Car Guy and I made a preliminary trip to our cabin to assess the damage and one subsequent trip to bring home a few more little things. We found our two golf carts and The Car Guy has talked to a cart repair shop about availability of parts should we decide to haul the carts home, repair them, and sell them. Hopefully there is not a  Cartstealis vulturus operating at Hidden Valley!

This entry was posted in: Home Life


My new blog is at https://amusives.wordpress.com/. It will continue to feature my Photos and Stories with a Canadian perspective. My main interests are Amusing Quotations; Birds and Bugs; Plants in my Backyard; Places I visit; and Current Affairs


  1. It is hard to believe that one human being would even think of taken advantage of this kind of situation, but it does happen and way too often. They should be there to help, not steal. How can they live with themselves?


    • I think people will do just about anything if they think they are justified. Even flood victims can appear to be ‘rich folks who have more than they need’ to people who want what someone else has!


  2. Layton says

    I don’t understand why I can never like your posts. An extra blank window always pops up and locks me out… : ( Maybe I am suppose to comment instead? Anyway as always I enjoy your posts and catching up with what the car guy is up to. I am predicting sunny days for the rest of the year!


    • I don’t know either, Layton. I can ‘Like’ your posts.
      Sunny days – that would be nice. Fewer mosquitoes would be good too!


  3. Seems to happen at every disaster site, the vultures get in. Should be put down, no protection, but if its like here in the UK, slap on the wrist, don’t be naughty etc etc. Insurance companies are the same world wide. Deny the claim is their first response


    • Thanks for your comment. Ticks! I hadn’t thought of using them as a comparison, but it is a good one.


    • Very good, Al. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, we live in Canada where so few of us are pistol packin’ mommas!


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