Quippery
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Christmas Quotations

Christmas The Quippery

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.”
– Garrison Keillor, Leaving Home –

Colored lights blink on and off, racing across the green boughs. Their reflections dance across exquisite glass globes and splinter into shards against tinsel thread and garlands of metallic filaments that disappear underneath the other ornaments and finery.
– Vera Nazarian, The Perpetual Calendar of Inspiration –

He sprung to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew, like the down of a thistle:
– Clement Clarke Moore, A Visit from St. Nicholas, 1823 –

Q: How can Santa deliver presents during a thunderstorm?
A: His sleigh is flown by raindeer
– Readers Digest –

How about we agree to leave Santa (and Frosty and all storybook characters) to the kids so the grown-ups can deal with real world issues, like adults? (In response to Santa being used to warn children about Climate Change.)
– Stephen Ewart, Calgary Herald, November 29, 2011 –

I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old, familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet
The words repeat
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!
– Henry Wadsworth Longfellow –

In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it ‘Christmas’ and went to church; the Jews called it ‘Hanukkah’ and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing each other on the street would say ‘Merry Christmas!’ or ‘Happy Hanukkah!’ or (to the atheists) ‘Look out for the wall!
– Dave Barry –

I think Santa has riverfront property in Brazil. All our presents came from Amazon this year.
– Author Unknown –

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles or rhinoceroseses
I only like hippopotamuseses
And hippopotamuses like me too!
– Written by John Rox, sung by Gayla Peevey in 1953 –

My eggnog recipe is pretty special. It could be that it’s actually flavourful and doesn’t just taste like sweet milk (or maybe it’s just the bourbon, who knows?), but the holidays aren’t the holidays without it.
– Jamie Oliver –

Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out any quicker than the Christmas spirit.
– Ken Hubbard –

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies!
– Francis Pharcellus Church –

Once again we find ourselves enmeshed in the Holiday Season, that very special time of year when we join with our loved ones in sharing centuries-old traditions such as trying to find a parking space at the mall. We traditionally do this in my family by driving around the parking lot until we see a shopper emerge from the mall, then we follow her, in very much the same spirit as the Three Wise Men, who 2,000 years ago followed a star, week after week, until it led them to a parking space.
– Dave Barry –

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
– Victor Borge –

Some of the most wonderful things have to be believed to be seen. Like flying reindeer and angels. Like peace on earth, goodwill, hope, and joy. Real because they can be imagined into being. Christmas is not a date on a calendar but a state of mind.
– Robert Fulghum –

The Supreme Court has ruled they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.
– Jay Leno –

Three phrases that sum up Christmas are: Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men, and Batteries not Included.
– Author Unknown –

Q: What is Santa Claus’ laundry detergent of choice?
A: Yule-Tide.
– Readers Digest –

1914 WWI Christmas Truce
‘Twas Christmas in the trenches, where the frost so bitter hung
The frozen fields of France were warmed as songs of peace were sung
For the walls they’d kept between us to exact the work of war
Had been crumbled and were gone for evermore.

My name is Francis Tolliver, in Liverpool I dwell
Each Christmas come since World WarI I’ve learned its lessons well
That the ones who call the shots won’t be among the dead and lame
And on each end of the rifle we’re the same.
– ©1984 John McCutcheon/Appalsongs (ASCAP), Water from Another Time: a Retrospective –

This entry was posted in: Quippery

by

Photos and Stories with a Canadian perspective. My three blogs showcase my main interests: Birds and Bugs; Plants and Places; Current Affairs.

6 Comments

  1. I believe this is the first time I’ve experienced the Christmas Spirit in April, and y’know… it feels good! Strange, but good!! Wonderful combo of humor, sentiment, faith, reverence, irreverence, and wisdom– thanks, Margy!!

    Like

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