Mildly Amusing Missives #7 – Happiness Is…

Not Too Serious Politics

Albrecht Dürer and Parti Rhinocéros
Logo used by the Rhinoceros Party of Canada in the 20th century. Taken from the 1515 ink drawing by the German painter Albrecht Dürer.

The Parti Rhinocéros or Rhinoceros Party, was a Canadian political party from 1963 to 1993.

Informally called ‘The Rhinos’, the party was started  by Jacques Ferron, a Canadian physician and author. The rhinoceros was chosen as their symbol  because politicians are: “thick-skinned, slow-moving, dim-witted, can move fast as hell when in danger…”

The organizers said they were Marxist-Lennonist, which was a tip of the hat to Groucho Marx and John Lennon. The party platform was described as being ‘two feet high and made of wood’.

Music from a Marble Machine

Isn’t this just about the most amazing machine you have ever seen?

More from Wintergaten.

A Clothes Dryer

I saw a cartoon that showed two women standing in the backyard, admiring a nicely pegged line of clothes on a clothesline. The one woman remarks, “It dries the washing using the very latest technology – a combination of solar and wind power.”

How many of you remember using that technology? There was little to nothing blissful about it. It was brutal in the winter, wicked on a windy day, useless when it was raining and shitty when some birds landed on the lines.

I love my dryer…

Watching a Snow Video in the Summer

This Video was especially funny the first time we saw it because we were in Arizona during the storm.

Things That Tell The Truth

Small Children
Drunk People
Yoga Pants

What would you add to this list of things that tell the truth?

Mildly Amusing Missives #6 – Tweets

What You Should Know About Naps

Too Many Words

How Much of your Day is Spent in Landscape Mode?

Trump Derangement Syndrome

So You Want Something for Nothing

Will Great Britain Ever Leave the EU?

But after two years of watching one deadline give way to the next, does anyone really believe Britain will meet this one?
– Emma Ross-Thomas, Bloomberg –

Who You Were Will be More Important Than Who you Became
So You Think You are Overtaxed?

Canadian Taxes on Gasoline: Federal Tax, Provincial Tax, Sales Tax and Carbon Tax.

On the Food Front

Bathroom Thoughts

Ever notice that public restrooms sometimes mount the paper towel dispenser so high that the water drips up your arms when you reach for the towel? (Or maybe that is just something that happens to short people…) Some restrooms only have air blowers and they are so weak you finally just wipe your hands on your pants.

Do you agree that you should  “Avoid using the handicapped stall unless you are entitled to do so?” I think that is bad advice. The handicapped are perfectly capable of waiting a few minutes for their stall to become available and it is silly to leave a stall vacant when there is a long line of people waiting to use the facilities.

What did you find Mildly Amusing this week?

Well of Lost Thoughts – 2018

When I find ideas that speak to me, but I’m not ready to blog about them, I save them on my Fueled by Chocolate ‘Well of Lost Thoughts’ Facebook Page. Here are just a few of the ones I have ‘rescued’ from there to share with you.

The Man Drawer

The Car Guy has more than just a Man Drawer – he has a whole Man Cave!

Tupperware is forever.

I had the square cake container and the lid finally cracked when it was about 25 years old. I contacted a Tupperware person and they got me a replacement lid – for free.

Tupperware® brand products were introduced in 1946. The first Tupperware Home Party was held in 1948. By 1951, the Tupperware Home parties were working so well that all products were taken off store shelves.

Tupperware advises that Vintage Tupperware (made before March 2010) is not BPA-free so should not be used for food prep or storage. It is, however, up to individuals to assess whether BPA is as big a health risk as the media made it out to be.

Health Canada’s Food Directorate continues to conclude that current dietary exposure to BPA through food packaging uses is not expected to pose a health risk to the general population, including newborns and young children. This conclusion is consistent with those of other food regulatory agencies in other countries, including notably the United States, the European Union and Japan.
– Health Canada –

And What Are Plastics Made From? OIL!

Canada – 2018 was dominated by the Oil Pipeline Story. It continues in 2019 and the fall out could affect two elections this year. Alberta could turn their backs on the Left wing NDP party, while Canada may turf out the Left wing Liberals.

So to recap: Trudeau’s replacing the Minister who couldn’t get any pipelines built with the one who couldn’t get any infrastructure built, and replacing his former Trade Minister who couldn’t get any trade deals done with his former Natural Resources Minister who couldn’t get any pipelines built. That should make everything better, right??
– Conservative MP Blake Richards –

The issue is how to get Alberta’s Oil Sands product to market. Alberta wants to expand the capacity of existing pipelines and build new ones. They are not allowed to do this under today’s political climate. Until pipeline capacity is increased, oil is increasingly being transported by rail and truck, both of which are less environmentally friendly than a pipeline.

Environmentalists and activists, frequently funded by American money, have played a large role in blocking new pipelines. They have been highly effective in gathering public support and electing governments that support their anti-fossil fuel agendas. They live in a fantasy world…

Unfortunately, with two distinct functions in the economy, the misperception that more wind and solar (used for electricity) will displace oil (used for transport) feeds an ignorance that hinders sound energy policy.
– Jude Clemente, JTC Energy Research –

What would happen to the US today if the fossil fuel industry went on a strike of indefinite duration? What would happen if we gave the environmentalists what they want? Instead of nibbling around the edges, what if we just went all the way? What would be the consequences if Atlas shrugged?
What If Atlas Shrugged? By David Deming, February 7, 2013

The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers wrapped up its $1.1 million cleanup of the Dakota Access pipeline protest camps on federal land in North Dakota, hauling away 835 dumpsters of remaining trash and debris. The site, once occupied by thousands of environmental demonstrators, is now vacant.
– The Washington Times –

Speaking of Fuel

One combine in the field behind our house last fall.

Last fall, 20 combines and drivers  joined forces to harvest Brian Williams’ crop of durum wheat near Milestone, Sask. Williams died right as harvest was getting underway.

The World Record – a total of 303 combines were working all at once in a field of winter wheat south of Winkler in Manitoba in 2018.  This event raisies money for Children’s Camps International (CCI) through its Harvest for Kids event.

I bought an ant farm. I don’t know where I am going to get a tractor that small!
– Steven Wright –

Every Day is Nude Day with Nudinits

Mike Rowe: “I’ve just been informed it’s National Selfie Day. Something to think about…”
David Vitti “It’s also international “Hike Naked Day.” It really bothers me that these two days coincide…”

About a Frog

A lonely frog, desperate for some form of company telephoned the Psychic Hotline to find out what his future held. His Personal Psychic Advisor told him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”
The frog was thrilled and said, “This is great! Where will I meet her, at work, at a party?”
“No” says the psychic, “in a Biology class.”

Experiences from ‘The Good Old Days’

Question: Name a struggle you had growing up that kids today will never understand. – Matt Whitlock –
Answer: Fixing a typo involved pushing back your typewriter a character, inserting the white-out strip, re-typing the wrong character to place the white, removing the whiteout, pushing back the typewriter a character and typing the new character. You did this for each wrong character. – Blair King –

Literary Perspectives

When finding a new word, I tend to look it up before reading the rest of the written work to gain a full understanding. ‘Incel’ was such a word. After finding the definition in the urban dictionary, I couldn’t find the ambition to read the rest.
– Harold Sleeper –

Well to be perfectly honest, in my humble opinion, of course without offending anyone who thinks differently from my point of view, but also by looking into this matter in a different perspective and without being condemning of one’s view’s and by trying to make it objectified, and by considering each and every one’s valid opinion, I honestly believe that I completely forgot what I was going to say.
– Daniel Zimmerman –

Since 1982 the English Department at San Jose State University has sponsored the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, a whimsical literary competition that challenges entrants to compose the opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels. For example:

Knowing well the hand signals of his platoon leader, Private James Dawson silently dropped to the dirt, concealed and motionless for what seemed an eternity, a move that he had learned, coincidentally, from his parents whenever the Watchtower ladies would ring the doorbell.
– Peter S. Bjorkman, Rocklin, CA –